Dilute.netWords - Madlibs -Sestinas - My Poems - My Photos

[randomly selected from all my photos here]

Ad-verse (by Josh Mandel)

Escorted Europe Tours
at discount prices
are enticing,
like the concert tickets,
wonka bars,
and kitchen sinks
that Google's pushing right
beside my e-mail.

Thank heaven for the Internet!

I mean, they really tried
to offer me a kitchen sink,
complete with "experts" to advise me
on my "kitchen sinks needs."

Now I'm an ignoramous
when it comes to plumbing,
but I'm pretty sure
this "HandyHome Guide"
won't address my needs.

The page consists of
a list of ads
above a list of ads
below a little graphic
of a house.
And at bottom, naturally,
it's copyright
two thousand five, all rights reserved.

Last night a server somewhere
on the information superhighway
entertained the notion that
I might enjoy a pair of
inline skates,
with "free fast shipping"
and "effective breaks" ---
"exactly what I need."
I'm hazerdous enough at
low velocity!

But sometimes it occurs to me
that Google's right,
perhaps they know me better
than I know myself with thirteen thousand
e-mails logged and analyzed.
Perhaps their urgings are astute:

'Cause I can almost see myself,
lug wrench in hand,
or whatever kind of wrench you use
to fix a sink (I'm sure the experts
know.) and chowing on a wonka bar,
anticipating Europe as I skate
my way across the kitchen floor.
[randomly selected from 21 poems/paragraphs here]

(who the heck... ?)